Right after college I worked for a crazy drunk who kept a stable full of bright, talented, criminally underpaid and forcibly demotivated young people. To quell the horror of our workday existence, one of my coworkers forwarded a list that was supposedly from Letterman: The Top Ten Least Popular Candle Scents. I can’t find that list now to share with you here (FSM bless you if you can wring it out of Letterman’s semi-functional Top Ten archives), but I remember clearly that from our veal pens, we kept adding to that list until we had more than a hundred.

So, get creative! How many unappealing scents can you come up with?

* with apologies to the Washington Post

A few other choice favorites:

45. See all of Shakespeares’ histories performed. Yes, even the crap ones. (Helloooooo, King John!)

29. Watch the sunset from inside the “Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure” dinosaur.

21. Kill a zombie.
14. Understand a Tom Stoppard play on the first viewing.

11. Memorize enough digits of pi to be impressive but not weird.

6. Correct Alex Trebek on the pronunciation of something French. Consequently hold him when he cries.

1. Live to see the day when smart and witty wins out over hot and shallow every single day of the week.

PS – Let’s also add “Visit the Museum of Menstruation” to this list – which I know that at least three Culture Geeks have done.

Stay tuned for the 10 Least Sexy Rock Stars, featuring this guy:

«It will be gone by June.»
Variety, passing judgement on rock ‘n roll in 1955.

«And for the tourist who really wants to get away from it all, safaris in Vietnam»
Newsweek, predicting popular holidays for the late 1960s.

(Via Kottke)